To many living a full life means living to see 80 years old. To others it mean having all the material things the best house, the name brand cloths and shoes, the most diamonds and driving the best cars. To me living a full life means making a positive name for myself. Living out my life to the best of my potential. I may not be the next Michelle Obama or Oprah, but I will make a change in my community and in my family. That name for me is going to be the best parent, the best spouse, the best co-worker and even the best member of my church and community. These are some of the things that i plan to accomplish in order to live my life to the fullest. The other name that I want to one day have for myself is being a successful business women. The owner of a full service salon and spa and the women who opened an outreach center for young girls who needs a second chance because they believe that the world has given up on them and they might not even be eighteen yet. This is how I want to be remember when my life is over. I want people to know that I made a difference in the world and in my community.


Like in the Walden story, I think people read to much into to many things. We are so consumed in how many of things we have that we don't realize that all we need is one. If we can afford it we have to have two or more cars, a summer house, a winter house and our house, when in the end all we need is that one car to get us around and that one house to lay our heads down. So I do take into account what was said in the story that instead of having millions have only a half of dozen and keep them on a thumb nails. By being so concerned with the little things we might cut our lives down and not be able to live them to the fullest. To me living means to just live and not let the little things hinder you.

To make these things possible in my life I have to finish the college journey and not let things get in my way. Once this is over then I have to start paving my way into this future that I have dreamed about. I have to surround myself with positive people and people that believe in me and wants to see my visions come true. I then need to take the proper steps to getting my business up and running. Since I want an outreach center for girls I have to find out the how I can get this started so that it can be a success and have girls that I can help to make a change in their life. Now right now I am truly focused on getting my master's degree in business. While I am in school I will start putting together my portfolio for opening up my salon and spa. I want to start writing for grants and getting help from other small business owners so that my business will make it and beat that five year failure ratio.

Over the last couple of years I have lost my way and focus on what I want. I have let people in my life change my focus. I have been letting small things deter me from what I wanted out of life. I have made it my business this year to not let nothing get in my way of success and this will ultimately help me out with living my life to the fullest. With all the many changes I go through, I can say that I have learned from them and I keep pushing forward. I just have to use my strength and determination to move forward. I know that whatever happens is to help me grow and make me into the person that I want to be.

Like in the Walden story our life in us is like the water in the river. To me this means that we have the potential to live full lives. The water in the river may flood over time, and this is the life in us. We may get over flooded sometimes but this just mean that we are living a life that is full. End the end live the life that makes you happy and makes you feel like you have lives a full life with meaning.

My Sublime Experience

(a.) It has been over three years since my aunt has been diagnose with lung cancer. She has never smoked a day in her life but still she managed to get lung cancer. She vowed against smoking when she was a little girl saying "it was nasty." Since her mother was a chain smoker she would often try to get her to quit saying that one day it could lead to lung cancer or death. So when she got ill and had to be rushed to the emergency room lung cancer was out the question for me. Now what may been out the question for me was the diagnosis for her. After numerous hours of testing and constant questions of her health history and our family health history, the doctor said that they had found large mass in her lungs and that it had proved to be lung cancer. My body began to break down but I had to hold it together for her and my family. I asked what they can do for her and there response was to get her over to MCV/VCU so that they can start chemo as soon as possible. They then said that it was not looking good for her and that she was in the 5th and final stage of cancer. This is when my body went numb and my mind went blank. I was beginning to feel hurt and pain like no other. There was no words that could express the pain I was going through. One trip to the emergency room might have been the last visual I would remember of my aunt and this was not what I was trying to have as a last thought of her. She was a mother to me, someone who I went to for advice, for them long late night talks when I felt like I had no where else to turn. I could not express to anyone what I was going through after the doctor had given us this plate full of bad news and no hope.

As we waited for the ambulance to arrive and take her from Memorial Regional Medical Center to MCV, I cried until I had no more tears left to cry. I paced the floor with anger in my heart. All I could think about was why was God going to take her from me. I just wanted to know why and I felt like I deserved an answer. What felt like a decade was about 2 hours and now we were in MCV waiting to see what news they were going to bring us. Once they ran all there test and made decisions on what they thought was best they came and got the family and told us that what seemed like the worse situation has some light on it. They felt that they could treat her with strong doses of chemo. They were even going to schedule her for surgery that night so that they could put a port in her chest. I began to feel a bit of relief and then I started to thank God for giving her a chance. Even though that night they had her so doped up, I still went to her and prayed and gave her a kiss goodnight.

That next couple of weeks were the worse. When we thought the battle was getting better it only got worse. Finally the doctors called me at work and told me to get to the hospital as soon as possible. They said that the chemo was no longer working and that the cancerous area had gotten bigger and beginning to take over her other lung. I dropped to phone and went into shock. My co-workers said that I went into a deep sweat and just started to shack. I do not remember this moment or how I was able to drive to the hospital, but by God's will I made it there. Once I arrived in her room there were about 6 or 7 doctors nurses etc., around her bed. She was just laying there not even knowing where she was anymore. They told me that the cancer had gotten worse and that the test had shown it was growing into her other lung. They said that it was nothing else that they could do for her and that they were sending her home on hospice that day. I felt like my world was coming to an end. My breathing got worse and I fainted. After coming around I could not speak, I couldn't move, all I could do was cry. The feeling that my body was going through was to much for my body and it didn't know how to react. They said that she may not make it through the night, but I am here to tell you that the devil was a liar and she made it not only through the night but to get treatment at the Virginia Cancer Institute. She is still here today and going through recovery. My experience through this is more than words can explain. I have cried tears of sorrow and tears of happiness once I knew that it was not over. I still can't determine which tears where which and what all the emotions I was going through but this experience I will never forget. Today the emotions that I have are because I know she has a fighting chance as long as she keep on fighting. This has been such and overwhelming experience and a blessing all wrapped into one.

(b.) There are some situations that give you experiences like no other. I am not one that seeks out experiences that have a life or death outcome, but I will prefer to go to a live concert or play versus watching it on television. The feeling that you get when you are in a crowd of a live concert is not replaceable. You get to feel all the energy in the crowd. Especially when the performers can give a good show. You get to experience all the love the crowd has for the performer. It is just so overwhelming that words won't do it justice. I do feel a rush that comes over my body when the crowd goes crazy and the performer feeds off that energy. Now when you are home in your living room you don't get that same feeling. You can cheer and act a fool but you don't get to feel that energy that comes from the crowd. Now with the plays its just makes you feel like you are apart of the show. An example is when I went to a Madea play. The actors interact with the crowd and make you feel like you are in the play. Then when the play is over it is like a old school throw back with all the songs they play and dancing they do on stage. If I was at home looking at the play on dvd, the play would of just went off and I would not have gotten all the extra stuff. To me its more exciting to be in the mist of the crowd, the experience is more overwhelming. I feel that people seek out different experiences for the joy it bring. They might just want to get a different experience that they can't get if they didn't do certain things. So in a nut shell experiences are experiences and they differ depending on the person and the situation.

What is an American?

To the next American,

To be an American you have to first know the history. You have to know the past of the country to be able to understand the future. Being an American is making your dreams a reality; changing the norm in society's eyes while turning the world upside down. Its about moving through the hurt and frustration to the bliss of happiness. Being an American is about taking ta stand, believing in the unknown and not settling for anything. You have to stick together and not give up when you don't achieve what you set out to do on the first attempt.

From Martin Luther King Jr. to Barack Obama, America is a place where dreams come true; where the poor can dine with the rich and where the uneducated can be educated. What you may think today is just someones dream can one day turn into a reality. Its a place of freedom and opportunity. Opportunity that allows you to get a college education or play sports that allows you to be a provider for your family. You can go from the outhouse to the white house. It does not say that you have to go in the same direction all the time because you can pave your own road so the next person can follow. This is what keeps America pushing through.

Now I know you maybe seeing and hearing a lot of America, but I am going to help clear the air and help you see that America is a place of change. Being an American is about change. Even though America is a melting pot of experiences it is also a place where all people are welcomed. You can go experience different religions without being criticize about turning your back on your own religion. You can even experience the difference cultures foods with the many restaurants and markets. Being an American does not mean that you have to stick to the way things use to be. You have a chance to do things your own way. You can dress just about any way you want. You can mark your body or your temple with tattoos and piercing. You can drive a BMW or a Ford. Now if driving isn't your thing then you can also use public transportation like the bus or the train. Walking and catching a cab is always an option. You can also fix your hair anyway you would like. You can color, highlight it, chop it up or make your own style, the choice is yours. Its all about being you and no one else.

America is becoming a place where same sex marriages are looked at as being acceptable to do. The couples can even adopt and have children if they prefer. It is a place where your past doesn't have to hold you back from gaining your future. You can turn your mistakes into positive pictures. Now that does not mean that it is going to be easy just because you want it to be easy; you have to get it done no matter what. Americans are not as judgmental as you may thing or as they are being portrayed. You can even find biracial marriages taken place. Just because you grew up one way doesn't mean you have to find that soul mate of the same color. It is again about choice and it is yours.

With all the modern changes that are going on Americans are becoming more relaxed. Women are being able to do the same things as men. You can find a women in construction, laying bricks and building houses. You can even find women playing competitive sports and becoming pastors of churches. Now men on the other hand are slowly changing to. You can find some men staying home and being the mother while the mother is working. You can even find mind doing duties around the house like cleaning and cooking. These changes that are being seen by Americans are making the world a better place.

Now with the good also comes the bad. You are not always going to find people who are 100% acceptable 100% of the time. You will find the ones who don't want to change, who think that what is going on is going to fail. Some may say these people are scared to step out their box, but you don't have to let them rain on your parade. You have to look pass them people and push forward, for even Jesus had the disbelievers around him. This is what being an American is all about; taking the good with the bad.

America is what you make of it and how you choose to perceive it. My only advice would be to enjoy every experience and make the best out of it. If what you want is not out there or you can't find it then make it there. You have the keys to success within you and can't anyone take it away. Stay positive and true to yourself and allow room for mistakes; for that is how we learn and grow. I wish you safe travels to the country and I know you will be a great American because I gave you the tools to succeed.

Your Truly,
An American

Hello World

My first blog post